Small Struggles

Life outside of the Marine Corps has been busy to say it simply. We moved out here in the beginning of March. I didn't start my job until the end of March. The hubs doesn't start the academy until Monday so he has had a nice break.
I on the other hand have not had a break. Sure, I had a couple weeks off but I had to get the house together, go to my first day of that "awesome" new job and quit the same evening. Then I had to call up Sears to set up an interview for a transfer so I can do my old job in a new place. I started that job and a week later I got my truly awesome new position as a manager. All of this while taking classes.
I absolutely love my new job. That is the first time I have ever said that and truly meant it. There is only one problem. One of my associates is having some issues. He was up for the position as well. So not only did he not get it but he has to work for me. At first it was tolerable. He seemed to be hiding his disappointment well. But in the last week he has been purely defiant and destructive. He doesn't do anything I tell him to do or he tries to do them in different ways and messes everything up. I don't think he realizes how destructive he is being but it's out of hand. The assistant store manager is talking to him tomorrow but I know that when I go back I will have to show my authority and I'm not looking forward to it honestly.
I have wanted to use my degrees and be a manager and now I'm faced with the hard part. It would have been nicer to just start over with new associates but unfortunately he has to learn to respect me.

On a more positive note, we found an AMAZING church right around the corner. It has allowed us to finally attend church regularly and strengthen our faith. It has really helped with all of the stress I have been under lately. After not attending church while we were in Jacksonville it is such a refreshing blessing.

Pallet Table

So we have been in the civilian lifestyle for almost 2 months now. I started back at work several weeks ago. I got a promotion at Sears so I'm not a manager. It's pretty awesome.
Jon doesn't start the police academy until April 29th so we have had a lot of free time.
What did we do with that? We did a lot of shopping and built a pallet table.
Want proof? Ok.

They started like this...

 

 

and this...

 

So we turned it into this...

 

and this...

 

and then stained it to look like this...

 

 

and this...

 

and now it looks something like this...

 

 

We did purchase some lumber to border the outside and to give it sturdier legs but other than that and the price of nails and stain it didn't cost us anything. Those gigantic pallets were free. They originally had spaces between the boards which we didn't like so we ripped a couple off of one we weren't using and cut them down to fit those slots.

 

We got the design for the legs from googling pictures of pallet tables and finding one we liked. We edited it a little for our personalization but it wasn't hard to do.

 

If you have a saw, hammer, and nails (and I personally recommend wood glue as well) you can do this too. It was so easy!

 

We were inspired to make this because we could not find an affordable patio table that we liked. We both love rustic furniture so when we saw everyone building things out of pallets we said why the heck not?

 

We had planned on using normal sized pallets which I can say would have been a pain in the arse. We got extremely lucky to find such perfect sized pallets in such great shape for FREE!

 

Seriously, search craigslist for free pallets you will find a ton.

 

 

Free time has served us well. What will you be creative with today?

Eshakti love

I was recently contacted by a representative over at Eshakti to do a review on their clothes. It was perfect timing because I really needed a new dress blouse and they have a great selection. I chose the Bird on wires tie-front blouse.

I'm sorry I don't have a picture of myself in the shirt. My camera is missing with the move and I just now thought about taking a picture with my phone. I'll upload one later on.

Anyways, anything you order on this site can be made to fit your body style. You take your measurements and input them into the form and voila! You can also chose to select a generic size. I chose to go with a size small instead of doing custom measurements. Mainly because I could not find my measuring tape for the life of me. This move has made a lot of things disappear.

It doesn't matter though because the shirt is BEAUTIFUL and fits wonderfully. It goes great with a blazer or cardigan and I personally love it with dress pants. They have a ton of beautiful clothes from blouses to skirts. And who doesn't dream of having their clothes made custom to your body? They're great!!

I definitely want you all to at least look at the site. This is my second piece. I won a dress last year on Allie's blog over at My Marine and Me. She also happens to be a great friend who I just had to leave behind in Jacksonville. I miss you Allie! I saw that she had been contacted by Eshakti as well so you should go check out her post about it!

Talk to you soon <3

Adios Marine Corps...for now.

Today was my husbands last day in the Marines. He got his dd214 and we started packing up the house. We are headed out to Charlotte on Thursday.

I thought it would feel a lot different but honestly it just feels the same. Just another move. Maybe once reality hits in Charlotte I will feel a difference.

I'll try to keep up with blogging to talk about the transition but for now I have a ton of things to do!

Adios, for now!

Assault rifle ban

Wouldn't it be great if everyone could look at every situation objectively? If we could understand others point of view instead of projecting our passionate responses blindly?

My husband is one of the many people who are so passionately objecting this assault rifle ban. I understand his reasons, sort of. He thinks there is going to be another civil war and the government is trying to take away the people's weapons. I think anyways. That is the little bit he will let on. As I've mentioned before, he isn't great at expression.

I said I understand, as in I can understand what he is saying and why this would be his position on the matter. I do not think there is going to be a civil war. If there is then I hope the people who cause it realize how shameful they are. Our country is a lot better off than most.

Ok that was a bit of a rant. To get back to what I want to talk about... I'm not sure people are really capable of looking at a situation objectively once they create their opinion. With this assault rifle ban you have those for an against it. Those for it are the families who lost loved ones due to a murderer. In their eyes their loved one would still be alive if that person hadn't been able to access a gun.
Those who are against it see it as the government trying to take away their right to bear arms.

Both of these are good reasons to stand up for your choice. But neither reason gives you a right to act like a child and stomp your feet. We need to be able to think about this entire situation objectively to come up with the best possible answer.

For the record, I do not think banning assault rifles will prevent murderers from killing people. Drugs are illegal and we still have addicts.

 I think the government has an obligation to make the victims families feel at ease by doing something to allow them to feel protected as well as know their government is supportive. Banning assault rifles seems to be the obvious choice but it's not a great one.

If you put on your objectivity helmet for a second you will see that you can make both sides happy by compromising. You do not have to ban assault rifles to make the families feel like you are doing something to prevent this from happening. You can increase security at schools.

I'm also not quite sure why registering all of your firearms is such a big deal. Once again I think my husband might be a little paranoid about "the man" when it comes to something like this. It doesn't seem like there can be any harm from the government knowing what weapons you own. But on the other hand since I don't see the benefit of it either it seems unnecessary.

So I guess this was just a nice long chat about increasing security at schools instead of banning assault rifles. But the real message is to consider others and be objective. Let's all be better human beings.

My year, yea yea I'm back, sort of.

I know I said I was done writing but after realizing it is now 2013 I feel the need to write it out.

2012 went fast. That's really all I can say about this past year. My husband came home in February and now it's January 1 and yet it still feels like yesterday. Our daughter is almost 2 years old and has grown up so much this past year. Other than her milestones this year has just kind of rolled on by.

I blame it on the anticipation of our future. With my husband getting out of the military we knew that the beginning of 2013 was going to be a huge change. Now that it's January we have less than 2 months before we will be in Charlotte. I mean literally the first step in the rest of our lives is less than 2 months away.

Our 3 year anniversary is tomorrow. It feels like we missed a year and this should be our 4 year anniversary but I'm not quite sure why. Probably because the military has a way of making years seem twice as long. Although I am constantly stressed out lately due to this impending life change, I have to say that I am so happy that I have my husband and that we get to celebrate 3 years together. I know that so many women are not so lucky and would give anything to celebrate another year together. My husband is such an incredible man and I still thank God that he chose me.

I am sure that 2013 is going to fly by as well. Before I know it we will be in Charlotte, I'll have started my new career, Abigail will be 2 years old!, and life will start to calm down and steady out again.

Until my husband rejoins the military as a reservist. But that's a story for another day.

As of today I am promising myself that I will worry less and trust in God more. I spend too much time stressing over things that are happening regardless and less time just going with the flow. It's time to kiss the stress goodbye and focus on the positives.

Happy new year everyone. I hope 2013 is everything you need it to be.

237th Birthday Ball

I know that you have all probably read 100 different posts about the ball so I will leave you with a few facts and pictures.

The facts of the night were...

-Husband choosing the moment the guest speaker took a pause in his speech to pop open his can of beer. I was mortified but every marine laughed.

-I found out the big beautiful cake is mostly cardboard.

-I did not dance once which was good because my dress required me to go commando and I was anxious about a peep show all night.

-I met Urkel. Not really but this guy looked just like him once he's transformed into Stephan. He had a nickname but once I pointed the resemblance out everyone called him Urkel. (He's cool and didn't mind).

-I met a female MGYSGT. Her husband is a GYSGT and is probably the closest to a greek god I have ever seen. She was really beautiful as well and I couldn't help but be jealous of the amazing, god-like couple talking to me.

-My husband ended the night with his head in the toilet. Not exactly how I imagined the ball but I'm sure he and all of the other plastered marines had a great time and that's all that matters.

I can only order prints of our professional picture but I have a couple others to share.

Oh hey I've been gone

So as you can probably tell I am not blogging so often anymore. I hate to say it but I think this chapter in my life has come to a close. I don't get the urge to run to my computer and blog about life anymore. It's probably due to the enormous amount of responsibilities that are in my daily schedule but that's neither here nor there.

I am feeling an urge to update everyone on my recent decisions.
We are exiting the military lifestyle in March of 2013. My husband has decided to become a police officer and he has been offered conditional employment by the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department. Therefore we will be moving to Charlotte (or a nearby town) very soon.

I'm excited about the move but the transition makes me want to throw up. He won't start the academy until June it looks like so for 3 months he won't be employed. That means I don't have a lot of time to search for employment. Unfortunately this stresses me out to no end.

I am almost done with my first semester of my MBA and will soon begin my second. I take 2 twelve week classes at a time and they are back to back. Thankfully I do not ever feel overwhelmed but I do stay quite busy.

Unfortunately simply being enrolled in my MBA program does not mean I am anymore qualified for certain positions than only having my bachelors degree. It's a little disconcerting but I know eventually I will complete the MBA program and then hopefully it will advance my career, should I be lucky enough to find the right company in the near future.

As far as leaving the military goes I am on the fence. I think it's ridiculously foolish to give up a job in this economy especially one that leads to such great retirement benefits. But I know my husband is unhappy and it is easier knowing he already has a career lined up. That is if I can take the reins on my stallion of a husband and make him stick with this new career.

I find myself wondering if I could be in the military. The answer always leads to if I didn't have Abigail. I would never be able to leave her for the length of time I know would be required of me. My husband is a much stronger person than I could ever pretend to be. Although it would be delightful to feel important in a career for once in my life.

I desperately want to find my purpose in life. Professionally that is. I hate settling for work that I would be accepted for without any college education. I have earned my degrees and should be able to use them. I'm very hopeful for Charlotte and yet dreading it at the same time.

I suppose maybe I did need to vent on here a little bit.
I am on here nearly every day reading all of the blogs I follow. I just haven't written in a while. I'm not saying goodbye forever I'm just officially stating that I probably won't be keeping up with posts on a regular basis like I used to.

Well Hello Again

I know, I know. It's been way too long. I can't even remember the last time I was on here. Life has been crazy and stressful lately so I've neglected my blog.

I'm back because I have to write out some stress and frustration.

My husband has decided to get out of the military. He is officially done in March. He has a conditional offer of employment with the Charlotte-Mecklenburg police department. He just has to pass the polygraph I believe and he will be accepted into the academy. This is awesome news because until this I had no idea what our future was looking like and I'm not comfortable being that blind.

There are a couple huge obstacles we have to work through though. First, as of right now the academy doesn't start until June of 2013. So that means he will be without work for 3 months. That puts a lot of pressure on me to be able to financially support us during that time.

So the second obstacle is that I need to find a job in Charlotte relatively soon. I would transition my job with Sears out there but I don't make enough to be able to cover rent and bills all by myself. So I need to put my degree to use and hopefully find a finically supportive career. It has been the goal all along obviously but when you put a time limit on the search it becomes a lot more stressful.

The third obstacle is going to be convincing my husband that we need to rent for at least the first 6 months. He wants to buy a house right away but in order for my income to be on the loan I would have to either be transferring my job to Charlotte or have been working in the area for at least 30 days. He thinks I should go out there by myself in January to start working and live with my aunt and uncle until he can join me. I have absolutely put my foot down on this. Renting is our only option and I don't see why he doesn't see that. I refuse to leave my daughter for that amount of time and I think it is just too big of a decision to make so quickly. Plus it puts a lot more stress on us that is unnecessary.

On a positive note, I finally got my NC license. Third times the charm I guess.

I am so stressed. I have no idea how people transition out of the military smoothly. I feel like we are about to be jobless and homeless.

Advice?

The Ball!

Our Marine Corps Birthday Ball is just over 3 months away. This year it's November 20th. We are yet to make it to one of my husband's balls in the 3 1/2 years he has been in. So this one has be be perfect because we might not get another.

One thing that I am super thankful for is that I already have my gown. I showed it before. It makes it really easy and motivates me to keep in shape. I know what I have to fit into and I can continuously try it on to make sure it works.

I can't believe it's the second half of the year already. My husband's military career could be over at the beginning of next year so it's a crazy thought.

But here's to the beginnings of ball preparation!

And I'm super nervous

I received a call today from the Dance Theater of Jacksonville to let me know that my class will be starting tomorrow night.

My first reaction was "Holy cow that is really short notice!" My second reaction was "OMG I don't want to do this anymore!" and my third reaction was "I can do this. I can definitely do this!"

I have to say that I am super happy that I have Allie from My Marine And Me going with me. It always helps to overcome nerves when you have someone going through it with you.

In other news, I have decided to start eating healthier. Since starting work at Sears (about 2 months ago) I have gained 10 lbs. Yes, 10 flipping pounds. Why? How? Well it's simple, my jobs has a ton of down time and I'm a bored eater. The only snacks in our break room is vending machine junk so I've been eating junk for 2 months. It's horrible and I have shamed myself.

BUT I'm not giving up. I am annoyed at all of the downtime that comes with my job. I much prefer a high paced career but this is what I've got. So I will beat the boredom munchies by bringing my own snacks.

I just purchased the Women's Health Wightloss Guide at the store and it's my healthy lifestyle bible. It has fantastic food ideas, meal plans, workouts to get thin, and tons of knowledge and inspiration! It helped me realize I was gaining weight and it was my fault for eating horrible things but it showed me how to fix it.

Seriously, it's the best $10 I've ever spent. Since I started working I stopped running which also didn't help so I need these quick workout ideas to throw into my schedule every day to get back into shape.

I will admit that the Olympics is a great motivator as well. I am so proud of team USA. They make me want to do my best all the time.

Speaking of doing my best and just to make this blog a complete ramble, I start my MBA in like 2 weeks! I think I already mentioned it but I'm so nervous! More excited because I really love school and learning. I'm a huge nerd. But I'm really nervous because it's so expensive so I have to do my best to make it worth it.

Ok, that's my daily, or lately weekly-ish rant.

It's been a while

It's been quite a while but I have been busy/nothing to talk about.

I have been struggling lately. I enjoy my job for the most part but I can't stand that I support a company that I despise. Not Sears, but M&G that we use for our jewelry repairs. They are a horrible company and it makes me sick having to promote them. Plus, I really don't make a lot of money so it barely makes it worth it.

I have been thinking about applying to other jobs and I finally applied to one tonight. I figured if I get it then it's meant to be and I will quit my current job. As for now, we need the extra income even if it's just a pittance to what I could make elsewhere.

Also, I start my MBA at the end of the month! I'm excited and nervous. We just bought a new desk top which I'm hoping will make my school work easier. But really my husband bought it so he can play this ridiculous racing game. I hate video games so I'm not really happy with that. But oh well.

Other than that I don't have much to talk about. My life is hectic but boring. I have been seriously slacking on working out and have gained some weight which also is not a happy thought. I'm falling apart lol. I really need some guidance and motivation.

It's official, sort of

I talked about getting back into dance in my last post. Well it's sort of official! By that I mean Allie called the Dance Theatre of Jacksonville and they gave us a price we can live with ($44 a month). That was the deal sealer for me.
I guess the class wont start until September or so and it will be Tuesday nights. I'm a little bummed that it's only one day a week but you have to start somewhere right?

When I used to dance as a kid I had practice at least 3 times a week so I think that was burned into my brain. But I am lucky enough to have a baby girl who loves to dance so I can just practice every day at home with her :-)

I have to admit that I am super nervous for a couple reasons. First of all, I have no idea what to expect. It's an adult ballet class that is open to anyone. If it's open to everyone I'm assuming it's not going to be unbearably difficult. At least I hope not.

Also, I'm nervous because I don't remember any of the ballet positions. I know a lot of them I just couldn't tell you what position they were. Most of my dance was clogging (or tap) but I always loved ballet more.

I can't wait to go ballet clothes/shoe shopping. Yes, I will find any excuse to buy new shoes but really I just love dance clothes. Leotards are super comfy and ballet shoes just make you feel pretty. I'm not a huge fan of the tights part but I'll deal.

The little girls ballet class has to wear black leotards with pink stockings. I kind of hope they don't make a bunch of adults dress the same. I would like a little freedom even if it just means I can wear a blue leotard instead of black lol. And I prefer to wear shorts over my leotard. I always have so I hope that's allowed.

I hope it all comes back to me. I would love to jump back into it and have a good grasp by the time Abigail is old enough to start ballet class. Not that I want to do a mother daughter class though. I saw a couple of those at my little sisters recital and they look ridiculous. Except one. One was really beautiful. It was a mom who is like a pro at pointe and her daughter. If I get really good at pointe I might consider that.

Anyways, this is super long and dull I'm sure so I'll leave it at that.

Dancing

I used to dance when I was younger. I danced from like 3 yrs old until I was about 12 or something like that. I loved it but sports came into my life and I loved them more.

Now that I'm older I realize how much I miss dancing. I have missed it for a while. I think having volleyball throughout school helped me but now that I have no sport I'm back to missing dance.

Recently a friend and fellow blogger Allie mentioned how she wanted to take an adult ballet class. I immediately jumped at the chance and said I would go with her.

I am really hoping we can find something in the area. I haven't been this excited since my very first dance class. Maybe I can jump back into it and even become a dance teacher one day. (That was my childhood dream. Well to be a prima ballerina but same thing right? haha).

It doesn't help that I'm addicted to So You Think You Can Dance. I know I'll never be that good but I think I need dance in my life again. And Allie is right, it's never too late!

Where are the manners?

Have you read THIS article yet?

It's about a 68 year old woman being brought to tears due to the torments from a group of teenage boys. It broke my heart.

It's so sad to see children acting like this. Especially when they are mistreating people who are their elders. I was taught to respect my elders no matter what. I was also taught manners and values which apparently are absent among many children these days.

I know one thing is for sure. My daughter will grow up knowing how to properly behave and treat people. She will learn respect and know how to use it. We needs to make sure the next generation isn't a bunch of miscreants like these ones.

Plans?

Do you think our lives are mapped out for us? That we have destinies?

I was thinking about this tonight, I believe in destiny, and for some reason Lake Champlain popped into my head.

I remember being in middle school and learning about the lakes and for some reason Lake Champlain made me pause. I don't know why I still remember this but for whatever reason it felt important at that time.

Once I graduated high school and went off to college I went to Champlain College in Burlington, Vermont. It was right on Lake Champlain. I haven't been at Champlain college in 3 years and it's just hitting me now. It was like something was telling me that Lake Champlain was going to be an important part of my life.

Strange right?

Random I know lol. Just wanted to put that out there.

I've been MIA

My life has been pretty blah lately. We just got back from our trip to NY which was incredible. But now I've started my new job. I am so excited to be working but I have to overcome something terribly painful in order to succeed.

Dropping Abigail off at daycare is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. The first day she was miserable the entire day. She refused to take a nap and when I went to pick her up, her eyes were red from crying and she just look exhausted. When she saw me she screamed mama! and ran into my arms. That made me feel so much better.

But today I just dropped her off again. This time I dropped her off about 2 hours before I actually needed to. Simply because the first day I dropped her off it was nap time and I think that contributed to her being miserable. So I wanted to get her in there before everyone took a nap. I hope it's for the better because I pay by the hour so it's really cutting my wages in half.

It wasn't any easier letting her go again today. They were outside when I got there and one of the teachers came right up and asked her to come into her arms. She did but she was saying mama and reaching for me. When I went back inside I watched through the window for a couple minutes. It was maybe only a whole minute before she started walking back to the door and asking for me. I felt terrible so I bolted out of the room in a heart beat before she saw me.

How does this get any easier? The only way I can think of it being easier is if my husband drops her off instead of me. He doesn't cry so it wont affect him like it does me. But he goes to work so early that it would never happen. I just hate leaving her with someone other than family. It hurts. It even hurts when I leave her with my mother in law. I just don't like not having her near me.

What doesn't help is that between paying for childcare and working I barely make any contribution to our income so it's barely worth it for me to leave her with someone else.

I know it's good for her to interact with other kids and they have a wonderful program for them. I just feel so guilty that I'm not providing that for her. I'm tearing up just talking about it.

It's just hard. Really hard.

I DID IT!!!

I just submitted my final assignment as an undergraduate! I know it's not official that I am a graduate or anything but since I have an A average I can fail this last assignment and still pass (I believe) so yay!!

I am still nervous because I want my 4.0 but I am so relieved to be done, finally!!

I took a year off but still ended up graduating college the same semester as my high school graduating class so that feels pretty awesome. Especially since in the last 2 1/2 years I have gotten married, had a baby, and moved about 3 times.

I have moved into a new level in my life. I understand how hard goals are but that nothing is impossible if you have the will and support.

Now I get to enjoy my summer until I start my master's in the fall. Oh boy!

My Marine and Me Giveaway!!!

One of my favorite Bloggers, Allie, over at My Marine and Me is hosting a giveaway!

Now I am only posting this because I want the ship to shore dress super badly, not because I want a bunch of my followers to go enter and make me lose! haha. But I do want you to go follow Allie's blog. I promise you wont regret it she's fantastic!

Here's the link!

http://mymarineandme.blogspot.com/2012/05/eshakti-give-away.html

Stay in or get out?

Those of you who read this know that our minds have changed a million times on whether my husband should stay in the Marines or get out. For almost 6 months the decision has been getting out. Recently we changed our mind.

I say we because my husband is the sweetest man in the world and wont make this decision without me.

I'm not sure why, but my gut feeling is that my husband should stay in. I'm not sure if it's because I'm nervous for him to give up a steady paycheck in this economy. Or maybe because the military lifestyle has become our lifestyle and I'm scared of what life is like once we leave it.

I know that separations are horrible but getting 96's for major holidays are great. My husband having 30 days of leave a year to use is great. Not a lot of civilian jobs allow that.

For me, it comes down to my gut. I always try to listen to it and it's very strongly saying reenlist. Which is crazy I know. I mean what wife would chose deployments? Especially when we have a child. I have no idea. I guess I'm nuts.

Maybe it's the high paced life and adventure? I hate moving but the idea of getting to be in different parts of the country is pretty amazing.

Has anyone gone through this and can help us with a decision? I know my husband is struggling because he hates being away from us as much as we hate having him leave. But I know there is a part of him that wants to stay in. Any advice would be awesome.

Maybe one of your husbands was on the fence about reenlisting too and can help with feelings after choosing to reenlist? Or those who were on the fence and got out's feelings as well. I know it all comes down to whats best for us but we could use some experience.