It's official, sort of

I talked about getting back into dance in my last post. Well it's sort of official! By that I mean Allie called the Dance Theatre of Jacksonville and they gave us a price we can live with ($44 a month). That was the deal sealer for me.
I guess the class wont start until September or so and it will be Tuesday nights. I'm a little bummed that it's only one day a week but you have to start somewhere right?

When I used to dance as a kid I had practice at least 3 times a week so I think that was burned into my brain. But I am lucky enough to have a baby girl who loves to dance so I can just practice every day at home with her :-)

I have to admit that I am super nervous for a couple reasons. First of all, I have no idea what to expect. It's an adult ballet class that is open to anyone. If it's open to everyone I'm assuming it's not going to be unbearably difficult. At least I hope not.

Also, I'm nervous because I don't remember any of the ballet positions. I know a lot of them I just couldn't tell you what position they were. Most of my dance was clogging (or tap) but I always loved ballet more.

I can't wait to go ballet clothes/shoe shopping. Yes, I will find any excuse to buy new shoes but really I just love dance clothes. Leotards are super comfy and ballet shoes just make you feel pretty. I'm not a huge fan of the tights part but I'll deal.

The little girls ballet class has to wear black leotards with pink stockings. I kind of hope they don't make a bunch of adults dress the same. I would like a little freedom even if it just means I can wear a blue leotard instead of black lol. And I prefer to wear shorts over my leotard. I always have so I hope that's allowed.

I hope it all comes back to me. I would love to jump back into it and have a good grasp by the time Abigail is old enough to start ballet class. Not that I want to do a mother daughter class though. I saw a couple of those at my little sisters recital and they look ridiculous. Except one. One was really beautiful. It was a mom who is like a pro at pointe and her daughter. If I get really good at pointe I might consider that.

Anyways, this is super long and dull I'm sure so I'll leave it at that.

Dancing

I used to dance when I was younger. I danced from like 3 yrs old until I was about 12 or something like that. I loved it but sports came into my life and I loved them more.

Now that I'm older I realize how much I miss dancing. I have missed it for a while. I think having volleyball throughout school helped me but now that I have no sport I'm back to missing dance.

Recently a friend and fellow blogger Allie mentioned how she wanted to take an adult ballet class. I immediately jumped at the chance and said I would go with her.

I am really hoping we can find something in the area. I haven't been this excited since my very first dance class. Maybe I can jump back into it and even become a dance teacher one day. (That was my childhood dream. Well to be a prima ballerina but same thing right? haha).

It doesn't help that I'm addicted to So You Think You Can Dance. I know I'll never be that good but I think I need dance in my life again. And Allie is right, it's never too late!

Where are the manners?

Have you read THIS article yet?

It's about a 68 year old woman being brought to tears due to the torments from a group of teenage boys. It broke my heart.

It's so sad to see children acting like this. Especially when they are mistreating people who are their elders. I was taught to respect my elders no matter what. I was also taught manners and values which apparently are absent among many children these days.

I know one thing is for sure. My daughter will grow up knowing how to properly behave and treat people. She will learn respect and know how to use it. We needs to make sure the next generation isn't a bunch of miscreants like these ones.

Plans?

Do you think our lives are mapped out for us? That we have destinies?

I was thinking about this tonight, I believe in destiny, and for some reason Lake Champlain popped into my head.

I remember being in middle school and learning about the lakes and for some reason Lake Champlain made me pause. I don't know why I still remember this but for whatever reason it felt important at that time.

Once I graduated high school and went off to college I went to Champlain College in Burlington, Vermont. It was right on Lake Champlain. I haven't been at Champlain college in 3 years and it's just hitting me now. It was like something was telling me that Lake Champlain was going to be an important part of my life.

Strange right?

Random I know lol. Just wanted to put that out there.

I've been MIA

My life has been pretty blah lately. We just got back from our trip to NY which was incredible. But now I've started my new job. I am so excited to be working but I have to overcome something terribly painful in order to succeed.

Dropping Abigail off at daycare is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. The first day she was miserable the entire day. She refused to take a nap and when I went to pick her up, her eyes were red from crying and she just look exhausted. When she saw me she screamed mama! and ran into my arms. That made me feel so much better.

But today I just dropped her off again. This time I dropped her off about 2 hours before I actually needed to. Simply because the first day I dropped her off it was nap time and I think that contributed to her being miserable. So I wanted to get her in there before everyone took a nap. I hope it's for the better because I pay by the hour so it's really cutting my wages in half.

It wasn't any easier letting her go again today. They were outside when I got there and one of the teachers came right up and asked her to come into her arms. She did but she was saying mama and reaching for me. When I went back inside I watched through the window for a couple minutes. It was maybe only a whole minute before she started walking back to the door and asking for me. I felt terrible so I bolted out of the room in a heart beat before she saw me.

How does this get any easier? The only way I can think of it being easier is if my husband drops her off instead of me. He doesn't cry so it wont affect him like it does me. But he goes to work so early that it would never happen. I just hate leaving her with someone other than family. It hurts. It even hurts when I leave her with my mother in law. I just don't like not having her near me.

What doesn't help is that between paying for childcare and working I barely make any contribution to our income so it's barely worth it for me to leave her with someone else.

I know it's good for her to interact with other kids and they have a wonderful program for them. I just feel so guilty that I'm not providing that for her. I'm tearing up just talking about it.

It's just hard. Really hard.

I DID IT!!!

I just submitted my final assignment as an undergraduate! I know it's not official that I am a graduate or anything but since I have an A average I can fail this last assignment and still pass (I believe) so yay!!

I am still nervous because I want my 4.0 but I am so relieved to be done, finally!!

I took a year off but still ended up graduating college the same semester as my high school graduating class so that feels pretty awesome. Especially since in the last 2 1/2 years I have gotten married, had a baby, and moved about 3 times.

I have moved into a new level in my life. I understand how hard goals are but that nothing is impossible if you have the will and support.

Now I get to enjoy my summer until I start my master's in the fall. Oh boy!

My Marine and Me Giveaway!!!

One of my favorite Bloggers, Allie, over at My Marine and Me is hosting a giveaway!

Now I am only posting this because I want the ship to shore dress super badly, not because I want a bunch of my followers to go enter and make me lose! haha. But I do want you to go follow Allie's blog. I promise you wont regret it she's fantastic!

Here's the link!

http://mymarineandme.blogspot.com/2012/05/eshakti-give-away.html